The Hills are Alive.....

The Sound of Music is on the telly, haven't seen this movie in years. I'm not a huge fan of musicals, but when Maria feels the need to break out in song, I can just flip the channel... after all holiday weekends are full of marathons. Damn, I need a hobby...or a job... or something. Okay, gotta finish up because Maria is just about to sing "My favorite things"... time to go back to the Food Network.


p.s. Christopher Plummer was pretty dashing back in 1965, just sayin'.

Holidays

Happy Holidays Everyone! Hope it was a goody.

Its very strange today because it's Boxing Day and I have no mall near by... what's Boxing Day without Boxing Day shopping? I guess we'll find out...maybe to my horror, it will be like every other day with out a mall!

This year was my first year ever to have Christmas off the island, to have Christmas sans the family. It was different, it totally felt like there was a piece missing but this is what change is all about, I suppose. I'm thankful for what I have here, I'm thankful that Terry was able to get the day off work, I'm thankful for Rebecca and Court and the surrogate family I have accrued here since I've moved...with out them, it would have been a very long and lonely holiday. So, thank you :)

Once again, as the story seems to go here, it will get easier...next year it will be easier. I hold on to that, I've heard it so many times here that I'm starting to believe it. Next year, I will have my own family to contend with, it will be my son's first Christmas. And that in its self is a milestone, a stepping stone to start our own traditions. Every family has them and they all started from some where and now its our time to do them. Growing up and away from family is hard and I miss them everyday, especially on the holidays.

Let it snow....let it snow............let it snow.

I hate the snow, I hate the snow, I hate the snow!!!!!!!!!! (well, not really...but today I do)

Gah!!!

I come from Victoria, it maybe snows twice a year...if we're lucky and when it does, I'm all over it. Love launching myself down a hill at break neck speeds, its awesome.. its a treat, you know you have one weekend of total debauchery and then it goes away and you can look forward to next year. This is not the case in Elkford, it is a constant! it just keep piling up and up and up. Its over whelming, I've had a hard time keeping it together! I've never had problems with the weather before and I come from S.A.D.S central. Some people hate the coast because of all the rain and over cast weather, they get depressed, they buy special lamps and o.d on vitamin D... Me, never had that problem.. love the rain, love the wind... over cast weather never really bugged me. Now place me in a small town in the mountains and cover me with the white fluffy stuff and I loose my bloody mind.

It took me 20 minutes to leave my parking lot this afternoon.. 20 minutes! My car was buried. First you have to find the door, dust off all the snow and the surrounding snow (so nothing blows in the car), then get out the scraper, unplug the block heater, start the car and turn the defroster on high, dust off all the snow from everywhere, then scrape off all the ice, remember to put the block heater extension cord into the car so no one takes it, get into the car, wait for the ice on the inside of the car to melt so you can see out, put the car into reverse, discover the snow plow left a snow bank underneath your tires, go into the trunk and get the shovel, dig out the back tires, swear alot, ignore the smart ass neighbors, remember to put the shovel back into the truck only to discover you can't make it collapse back into its self (for easy storage, of course), swear some more, close the trunk, get back into the car, only to discover the ice still hasn't melted... do all this, just to drive 5 minutes up the hill. So you all must be thinking "Why don't you walk?" Well, because I'm 7 months pregnant, the roads are an ice rink and you try walking up two hills in knee deep snow... then I would be complaining about how it took me 20 minutes to put on all the water proof gear, just to walk 2o minutes up a hill!

The moral of the story is, its along way from Kansas Toto and I chose to live here. Everyone, I've asked said that its always hard the first year of living up here and next year it will be easier. Next year, I'm going to hire someone to do all this crap for me and stay warm until its time to leave. Gotta love the mountains, gotta love it.

That'll do donkey, that'll do

In true Christmas form, every elementary school has its Christmas pageant....errrrr... play... or as Josh reminded us... performance...

...So in true Christmas form, every elementary school has its Christmas Performance. Last night was Rocky Mountain Elementary School's time to shine. So naturally, Terry and I went to cheer on our darling nephew, Joshua's big time in the spot light. I'm no stranger to Christmas pageants..(I mean performances) because I myself, had a staring role as Mary's donkey in my elementary school performance back in the day. Yes, it was a hard role to learn...I spend hours becoming one with my inner donkey.. crawling on my hands and knees and sitting ever so patiently beside Mary while she did her bit...yes, I guess you could say that was my fifteen minutes of fame, if you could recognize me under my cardboard donkey head and my gray clothing. It was a proud moment for the Betts family, very proud indeed.

Anyways, back to the present...as in last nights performance. From what I gathered from the play (eerrr performance) was that it was Christmas around the world and each class had a different city or country. Josh's was England, the lights turned off and all the kids came out wearing black and in their hands they had different colour flashlights. They walked around the gym, flashing their lights all over to this beautiful music.. it reminded us of the Northern Lights because it was all greens, blues, oranges and reds. Absolutely beautiful, it honestly made me emotional, I had a hard time keeping it together. Josh's class moved me to tears. I think the amazing thing about the whole performance, Josh's and others, is that it wasn't typical Santa and Jesus...It was more than that, it was pure and involved everyone... different cultures and a different spin on your typical Christmas carol. Its a looong way from Mary's donkey, that's for sure, can't wait to see whats in store next year... or 5-6 years from now when its my own kid moving me and probably Terry to tears.

Christmas in the Koots.....

....or should my title be wacky and should I use a K for Christmas?

Kristmas in the Koots

Bah, whatever... whatever gets the point across I guess. Gotta love that tho, when people get wacky with the letters. I saw one once and it was the Christan Kids Klub, why didn't they go full out and make Christan - Kristan?....maybe because it would be sacrilege? or is it be because the abbreviation would be KKK... either way, kinda dicey.

Alright, now...that not really being the point of this post...it kinda makes me want to go on about it but I'll stick to the task at hand (and the original plan of this blog) and blabber about Christmas.

Yessssss Christmas, two weeks... yep slightly depressing. Especially since I haven't finished or really started on my shopping... not to mention it has to be packed off and mailed to the coast in time so my gifts will be there in time, not me personally but my gifts... I suppose you could say that is gift enough. Now, I just have to get my ass in gear and drive two hours to the nearest mall. That is a whole 'nother bag of worms, I miss 24 hour Wal-Mart and the mall being a 10 minute drive away. I got pretty damn good at leaving my house at 8:40pm, getting to the mall 10 minutes before closing and crossing off at least 3 people on my list in that short amount of time. I suppose I could floor it down to the Mini-Mart at 9:55 and buy everyone trout bbq lighters and scratch tickets...call it a day and brag about how I finished my shopping early, but how lame is that? I think my brother did that one year, because I totally remember getting a stress ball and Flinstone vitamins from him... either he was cleaver and was trying to say something about my health or he was just lazy... love you Brian, but I think I'm going with the laziness.

Monday is our big trip, I have to get my shit together on Monday. Monday we are making the 2 hour drive and hitting up Lethbridge... Monday get'r done... Tuesday get'r in the mail...Wednesday breathe easy and hope to hell that you didn't forget anything! Next year will be easier... hopefully... probably not, but at least I can think that way... at least I know that bribing the post lady wont get me (or my package) anywhere and getting your shopping done in November would make for an easy December. Right. Wishful thinking.

Breaking the Bacon Habit

One of the downfalls of being pregnant is giving up your vices, its been a hard 6 months so far...no beer (or booze for that matter), no self medicating on Advil and Gravol or any cold medicine... all your left to survive on is Tylenol (which, I'm still convinced to this day doesn't work), you loose all decent sleeping habits and lets not forget your sanity! Another thing your suppost to give up is cured meats, such as bacon, sausage and handling deli meats (wouldn't want to have a side dish of Listeria with your pregnancy, totally not on the menu)

Breakfast meats in my opinion is the best kind of meat, who doesn't love crispy bacon on everything?! According to Terry's trusty "Baby Bump" app on his iPhone, preggo's such as myself, are suppost to give up breakfast meats in their second trimester. And now that I'm rounding into my third trimester, I still haven't been able to break the habit of bacon. Going out for breakfast here is a staple and Elkford has one of the best greasy spoon breakfast restaurants one breakfast lover could ever ask for... did I mention the restaurant is attached to a gas station? Double kitsch, double goodness. Bacon is on everything I like to order at Curry's.. the Clubhouse.. the Daybreak breakfast.. hell, I order it as a side dish with my french toast.. and how could you order these things and say "Hold the bacon?" its just not the same, its just not right!

Today, however, I'm taking a stand... yes... I'm going to break my bacon habit. Sure, I'm three months late, but perhaps I can save my growing boy from the nitrates for the next three months. I'll just fill the bacon void with "Simulated bacon bits" (don't worry, its just soy..baby boy is used to soy, since I'm lactose intolerant) and starch... yes, I will suck it up and say "Hold the bacon, but can I have extra hash browns?" Its going to be a hard three months, since bacon is one of my most craved cravings, but I can do it... I will think positive, like when this baby is born I will celebrate over a nice cold beer and a huge plate of crispy bacon... yea, that's it, an incentive. Perfect. Only 87 more days to go......

The Phantom Menace

This morning the weirdest thing happened...

Now with my increasing belly, I've started to feel the difference between lying on my back and lying on my back with a bowling ball attached to it. So this morning, I woke up with a full bladder (as per usual)... hobble over to my bathroom..get ready to do my business and I had a phantom pee! A phantom pee! I get all ready to go and nothing... I guess since the baby wasn't sitting on my bladder anymore I didn't have to go.. no pee not so much as a trickle! Silly bugger! A phantom pee, one minute its there and the next minute its gone.

Conservative Hockey Night in Canada

I was just reading the news on msn's Canadian website and I read the funniest thing. Canada's pride and joy, Don Cherry is now getting into politics. According to msn.com he has made recorded messages endorsing the the local Conservative party member in the Toronto area.

Can you imagine... 5:30pm, just sitting down to dinner and the phone rings...you answer it and its a prerecorded message from Don Cherry??!!, the Don Cherry part isn't so bad, its the fact that its about the Conservative party. What a way to ruin your dinner!

The Sinister Black Friiiiiiiday

Today, I guess in American terms is "Black Friday" dun dun dun! Sounds so sinister, sounds like a war holiday or an anniversary of some tragic accident in American history.


But in actual fact, its the day after Thanksgiving and their equivalent of our "Boxing Day". Boxing day sounds more shopper friendly... perhaps Black Friday refers to the poor retail people that have to work on the busiest shopping day of the year... its the doom and gloom of having to deal with irrational shoppers looking to save 50 bucks on their flat screen t.v. It does make sense to have a heinous shopping day with wicked deals before Christmas instead of after but in the same aspect on Boxing Day you can buy all the crap you wished you got on Christmas.. Maybe Canada should have both??

So today being the day after an American holiday, we are faced with the television marathon. Lets see... TLC has What Not to Wear, A&E has Criminal Minds, National Geographic has The Dog Whisperer and well, now that its technically after Thanksgiving we are now cursed with Christmas movies, music and television. Don't get me wrong, I'm no Grinch.. but I feel that Christmas should stay in December...not November and NOT the day after Halloween when they clear out the candy to make room for Santa hats and Christmas balls.

Elkford has been amazing for that, at the beginning of November, Rebecca and I were driving down the street and people already had their Christmas trees up. Maybe its because of the weather? Because it snows so early here? I don't know, I come from a family that sets the tree up on December 22nd and takes it down on New Years Day...So this November business is totally foreign to me! Can't blame Elkford for trying... but if the town has been decorated since early November what is it going to look like when it gets closer to Christmas? We're in the East Kootenays not the North Pole! :)

Crock-pot Lasagna

Like always, Terry comes home from work to me in the kitchen brewing up some culinary wonders. Some questionable, some genius but Terry being the good sport that he is, always sucks it up and eats it! After all, I'm the only house wife he has and when you come home from work at 8pm, you don't have the choice of being picky! haha

So yesterday, after stewing about what to make for dinner and after feeling slightly sorry for my Crock-pot that has been neglected for over a year, I remembered an episode of Oprah I saw where Jessica Seinfeld made a full lasagna in a crockpot. Bingo! I looked up the recipe on the internet..but wasn't too keen on all the ingredients not to mention buying fresh ingredients in Elkford can be a bit of a chore. So I just used the basis of it...the basis being of layering and how long to cook for and at what temperature. Anyways, long story short, it was a breeze and you can just set it and forget it (yea yea catchy phrase)

What you need:

Raw Lasagna noodles
Tomatoes
Spinach
Italiano cheese (Mozzarella, Parm, Emmintal...etc)
Pasta sauce fixin's
So the premise is this:

Make up your meat or veggie sauce (cook beef before hand) in a bowl
Spread a thin layer of sauce on the bottom of your Crock-pot
Lay down your lasagna noodles, 3 fit in mine and of course you can break the noodles to fit
Spread some spinach, then cheese, then noodles, then sauce... you get the idea :)
Layer it up, cook it on low for 3-31/2 hours until noodles are soft

The best part about it is you can serve it right from the pot and the layers hold up pretty well when cut. Terry asked me if it was easier than making lasagna in the oven and I would say yes, because you don't have to precook the noodles and with the Crock-pot, you don't have to worry about it cooking all day, you can pre-make it and precook it.

If you want Jessica Seinfeld's recipe go to: www.Oprah.com/food/Crock-Pot-Lasagna-Recipe or just use your own recipe like I did.

Princess Lisa of the District of Elkford

The snow is here! And from what I hear from the locals, its not going away anytime soon. So I guess you could say this is the beginning of the end of my first winter here in the Koots.

But that being said, there is bigger fish to fry today! Why? Well... I hate to break it to you all but my running to become the next Princess is over. Damn you Kate Middleton! You ruined my inner teenage dream. 16 years ago, I can honestly say that Prince William and I were true sole mates... One day I was going to visit England and the Prince and I would cross paths and he would fall desperately in love with me and I would be the first punk rock princess. I would be a commoner princess, every teenage underdogs dream.

Did I ever mention I had an over active imagination as a kid? Yes... very much so. And did I ever mention I kept this a secret? Because I never wanted to loose my grungy punk prestige. No one my age (at the time) with Doc Martins, green hair and plaided out would ever admit to wanting to be the next future queen of England, I masked my dreams with posters of Kurt Cobain and Billy Corgan because...well... they had more street cred at the time.

Ahhhh well, 16 years later do I wish I was Kate Middleton? No. Prince William seems dryer than a popcorn fart and do I really want photographers fallowing me around day and night? People going through my garbage and airing my "dirty laundry"... no thanks. Its my job to air my dirty laundry (thanks Blogspot!) Not someone elses! Good Luck William and Kate and hey, if your planning on getting married next June perhaps we can make it a double affair :)

When a Griz is in Town, She Might as Well Bring the Family

Hahaha so today I was walking across the mall parking lot and I noticed on the Elkford town hall billboard that there is not only a cougar loose in town but a grizzly sow and her cubs lurking just up the street by our ski hill. Love the mountains, just love it!

Todays word of the day starts with the letter B

Bored: To make weary by being dull, repetitive or tedious

Bored as an Adjective: weary, pissed off, uninterested, sick and tired, listless, brassed off

Can be used in a sentence such as "I am very bored with this shitty weather"

V

Remember, Remember the 5th of November

Songs from the Graaaaaaaaaaave

In true Tu-Pac form, Micheal Jackson is releasing an album from the grave...OOOoooOOOOOooo! That shit is scarier an any slasher movie and is as completely unnecessary as a Paris Hilton album or a Jersey Shore sound track. Fans can look forward to buying this crap on December 14th...Just look for his creepy face because like every other Micheal Jackson album the art work is completely devoted to himself and well.... his creepiness.

Everybody loves a Sociopath...

Well, well, well our "beloved" premier has left the building.. with his tail between his legs and for good reason, less then 10% of our province had confidence in the bastard. Now, that being said... Gordon Campbell is the evil we know.

Now that he is gone, what rat bastard politician is going to take his place? We all know its going to be liberal and we all know it will be within the next week or so. So who will take his place? Who is going to do damage control? Is it fair to assume that all liberal politicians are the same? And what about the Harmonized Sales Tax? I suppose we'll find out.

To Be continued...

Boooo!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

In the spirit of All Hallow's Eve, here are some creepy ghost photos I found on the internet, now its up to you to determine whether they are real or not. Happy treat or treating!!

Eat. Pay. Love

I was on the coast not to long ago.. ok ok I came home on Tuesday...but still...
Anyways, the most common question I was asked by friends and family was "Do you have any weird cravings?"
And being pregnant, its like a get out of jail free card to eat almost everything you want. I went to the coast with a list of food, I had been craving but was unable to get here and I can honestly say that I spend soooo much on food it was insane.

First it was Noodle Box, absolutely imperative that I ate there first. Why? Because a few months back I lost sleep over the Malay Style Fried Rice... I could dissect each bite in my mind down to the bok choy and the little crunchy bits they put on top of eat box. It was so bad that I actually wrote the Noodle Box an email pleading my case.. pregnant, stuck in the mountains and no where near a Noodle Box.. I asked them for the recipe, naturally, they declined but offered to ship it to me.. tempting, I almost considered it.

Second was pepperoni Panago Pizza with jalapeno ranch dipping sauce. Now, we certainly aren't pizza deprived here in Elkford because we have the glory that is Kapps Pizza House.... however, it was the certain amount of grease and of course, the dipping sauce. The dipping sauce itself in large quantities could be consumed by its self. Needless to say, the day I ordered it, I went through two dipping sauces and four slices of pizza (did I mention I went out for dinner after wards? I'll get to that in a second)

Third was the Reef, more specifically the Trini Rotti from the Reef. Jerk chicken, potatoes and some magical sauce wrapped in a flat bread. After binge eating Panago Pizza earlier on in the day, I still managed to find room to have dinner with some friends down at the Reef. The Reef was always a staple when we lived in Victoria, every time friends came to town or if it was just a date night we always managed to end up there. The Rotti is so big, that eating it in one sitting is almost impossible, soooooo I had take away! Yes, I relived the Rotti glory two nights in a row..hmm hmm

So those were just the "must haves" I also ate from the Canoe Club, excellent dry ribs.. but to my surprise they were no longer on the menu.. I made up for it by eating every other appy they had and of course, Cactus Club. Cactus Club is a mother-daughter routine, every time my mum and I went shopping we would always stop there for lunch to eat potato skins, edammame and their cream of broccoli soup.

I was priding myself on not gaining that much weight so far in this pregnancy but I think I screwed myself. I was in Victoria for 11 days and I ate out about 7 nights. So, I guess you could say that my trip was good to see family and friends but great for satisfying the cravings. So, yes.... yes I have weird cravings... most I can manage but some I have to travel for.

Day 2

Snow Watch Day 2 : If snow looked like rain, then we'd have snow... but in actual fact its just rain.

Snow Watch Day 1

Yesterday, I got home from my visit to Victoria. And true to mountain form, its bloody cold. Victoria was a humid nightmare, one minute cold... one minute boiling hot. Since getting used to my dry atmosphere, I've always had a hard time getting my body temperature just right when I'm on the coast. Now that Halloween is approaching, we've come to the Snow Watch... the snow count down, "Any day now" and "Its been trying really hard the past few days" is what I've been hearing today and it damn near feels like it.

Snow Watch Day 1: Frosty trees, no frosty snowmen.

Halloween in the snow..hmmm... I remember one year it snowed in Victoria one Halloween and me thinking I'm the funniest person ever kept singing "I'm dreaming of a whiiiite halloween"... right, looking back... it wasn't that funny and I remember why I was a nerd in elementary school!

Anyways, last year when Terry moved out here and I stayed on the coast, I came out here to visit.. and yes, there was snow. Josh had so many layers under his costume, I wondered how he could move let alone be comfortable. So, is that what happens here? Do you buy your costumes extra large so you can layer up? Or do you wear your coat over your costume and flash your neighbors for candy? Or do you risk it and suffer hypothermia?
I suppose it all depends on how devoted you are to your costume, either way you do what you can for free candy. Me, I'm going to do what I did last year, wear my down coat (if it will zip up over my belly), touque, gloves, boots and pinch off my nephews stash. Perfect.

Slacker

Okay, Okay... I know its been a while. I have to get back on track, like everything I've started in my life, I always have a hard time fallowing through. Its one of my many flaws and I wonder why I've never accomplished anything in my life! So here we go again... daily blogs... daily... not monthly, weekly, daily. Alright, 'nuff said.

To be continued....

Playing House

I think I've been struck with the "nesting phase" of pregnancy because I have been abnormally active around the house...And by that, I mean I'm not spending all day just to clean the bathroom. I can't get enough done in one day, last night I was hanging pictures up at 10pm and this morning I was washing blinds before breakfast.

Totally abnormal behavior, anyone that knows me well knows that I'm pretty poor at playing house. Poor Terry, he bagged himself a pretty lazy house wife... Put it this way, its taken me since August to fully unpack the bedroom.

Until today! It is now safe to say that I've broken down the last of the boxes and used my dresser for what it was meant for...Holding clothes! No more piling clothes on top of a Rubbermaid tote until it topples over and consumes the floor, those days are gone! Gone with the wind.

I hope this serge of energy lasts, using my time wisely is actually fairly rewarding! Who would have thought?

Killer Queen

Gotta love cold days in... Dinner is in the oven, I'm wrapped up in a quilt, relaxing gun fire in the back round due to Terry playing Modern Warfare 2 and I in front of the computer looking up random shit.. as per usual.

So to my surprise, first thing I saw when I logged on to PerezHilton.com was Sasha Barron Cohen...and nooooo (and thank god) there will not be another Bruno movie but in sted he is scheduled to play Freddie Mercury in a Queen bio movie due out in 2011/2012. The movie only goes up to the bands 1985 Live Aid performance, which I think is quite tasteful because they wont get into the sad days of Freddie when he was sick and dying. Just watch the video for "These Are the Days of Our Lives" and you will know exactly what I am talking about. Every time I hear that song or see the video, instant tears! Too see someone as rad as Freddie Mercury waste away to nothing and sing a song basically about saying good bye could make any cold hearted brat (such as myself) break down and ponder life.

Anyways, the glory of it all.. is that I think S.B.C would make an awesome Freddie (So would my friend James...), he is tall and diverse enough to play such a character, I can't wait to see what comes of it. Because, moral of the story is Queen rocks the world! I've tried a million times to talk Terry into making Mercury a middle name to our child... hasn't quite flown yet, but then again.. There is another 5 more months of pleading to go. We'll see what happens.

Crier, Crier, Pants on Fire

11 minutes into the Oprah season premier and I've cried twice. Can you blame me? She's a house wife staple..

Anyways, damn hormones, turning me into a softy. I've prided myself on not being a crier, but with 5 more months of pregnancy, I'm doomed.

Talahase and Columbus in 3D? Yes please.

Word on the street (the street being mtv.com) is that they are making another Zombieland! Zombieland 2 and apparently according to the street (mtv.com) that it is going to be shot in 3D.

Amazeballs! I think its the way a movie about surviving and killing zombies should be made!
No word yet on when its scheduled to come out... but when it does, I'll make sure that my prized 6 readers will know about it!

Gaga Oooohh Lala

Just finished watching the MTV Music Video Awards...Good times. Shows like this always make me wish that I carried on with my mid 90's ambition to be in a garage punk band... But I gave up on learning to play the guitar less than a year I started. I still have my guitar but now it has turned into an art piece waiting to be hung up on my wall. I've always secretly wanted to be a singer but I couldn't carry a tune if my life depended on it. Lets hope that never comes to be because I would be dead with in minutes!

The show none the less was fairly entertaining, Kanye West closed the show with a song about giving toasts to the douche bags.. which I think will be stuck in my head for a few days to come. I was really rooting for Florence and the Machine to win an award, but alas the marvel that is Lady Gaga stole the show. Of course she did, her last dress looked like it was made from meat and it made me really want bacon and any excuse to eat bacon is a good excuse.

Sequel Shmequel

We rented Kick-Ass tonight from Shaw on Demand and as we were flipping through all the movies to order we came across Titanic 2.

What the hell is that?! Titanic 2... a sequel?? We all know how the movie and the real life story ends, so who would feel the need to write a sequel? So does Rose and Jack come back from the gave and form some sort of ghost ship and relive the whole experience all over again?!

They will make a sequel out of anything. Haven't we learned our lesson from Speed 2?

Death by Cotton Candy

Ohhhh god, I just binge ate cotton candy while watching Mermaids on CMT.
I don't regret watching Mermaids, that's an early 90's classic...but the bag of cotton candy...and well I suppose chugging a full bottle on Vitamin water didn't help either.


Damn impulse cravings. I went to the store to buy eggs and came home with sugary death.

Living with the Dead

Tonight its stormy... Thunder, lightening, horrible winds and rain... lots of rain. Terry is on night shift, so its just me and my kitty. I decided to grab some snacks and veg out on the sofa, god bless cable t.v. because on Viva Channel allllll night Saturday's are ghosty shows. And well, that IS my favorite kind of show.

So, I'm watching "Living with the Dead" and its about haunted houses and the people who live in them. As for most ghostly shows, they usually have a psychic investigative team come in and check things out, film in night vision cameras and try to scare the crap out of all the t.v viewers. I love shows like this because not only are they entertaining... sometimes freaky... but history is usually involved too and anyone that knows me knows that I love learnin' shit.

Anyways, as I sit typing this blog with this show on in the back round, I've decided the psychic chick in this show is my new hair hero. Not only does she bust shit up in the ghost world but she has this lion mane of awesomeness. In my next life, I hope I get an afro :)

Sob Story

Hormones are a funny thing... why? Because Dog the Bounty Hunter just made me cry.

True Story.

Breakfast of Champions

As per usual, I spend most of my nights flipping between Movie Central, OLN and the Food Network... I love the Food Network, soooo many good shows and not just cooking shows, but shows about food in general. And food, well its my favorite subject. How can you not live with out food? I've been addicted to it since I've been born.

Usually after Diners, Drive-in's and Dives (Triple D, to all the die hards) is Unwrapped. Unwrapped tells you how various foods are made.. I've learned how hot dogs, Runts and chocolate bacon is made. Mindless t.v? youuuu betcha! Anyways, today's episode was about American cereals, and if you've spent any long period of time in the States you would know that some of their candies, cereals and drinks are slightly different from ours. America is blessed with Frankenberries, Apple Jacks and Morning Funnies ( r.i.p 1988-1989). Morning Funnies ruled! It takes me back to the days when my family and I stayed with friends at their beach house on Lake Sammish, Washington.

The day after we got there we would take a trip to the local Fred Myer and stalk up on all the essentials for the next week. Anytime we were camping or away on a vacation, Brian and I were aloud to pick our own "unhealthy" cereals...as a treat, because after all... We were on vacation. When we were camping in Canada, it was always Lucky Charms... But when we were in the States, it was always Morning Funnies. Morning Funnies were basically Fruit Loops, but instead of loops they were fruity happy faces and on the box, they always had cartoon strips all over it.. In fact, the back side of the box you could open up a panel and on the inside was more comics to read.

Brian and I would fight over who would read the box while they ate the cereal, so my mother, sick of hearing us bicker, bought two boxes. One for me, one for Brian. But heaven forbid one of us ate the other ones box...So on the front of eat box was written our names in big bold letters. If I was caught eating from Brian's box, trouble would shortly ensue. But like all good things, Morning Funnies came to an end and we were left to find something new. If it wasn't for Morning Funnies, I wouldn't have found out about such great comics as Beetle Bailey, Marvin and Dennis the Menace. Where would my life be without them? Probably in the same place, but it was damn rad cereal.

Bustin' OUT

Becca and I said a big eff you to Elkford today, and busted out to Pincher Creek. Where is Pincher Creek?, you ask... well its nestled sweetly between Brocket and Cowley Alberta. It is the Wal-Mart mecca of the Crowsnest area of Alberta. Pretty fuckin' exciting.

Pincher's Wally is the biggest Wally I've ever been too, its just jam packed with cowboys, Mennonites, Hutterites (Hooties to some...), oblivious country folk and families consisting of 6 or more children... love it.

Wal-Mart and I have a love hate relationship, we always have...I'm not to keen on the ruining small business thing but when you live in a town with maayyyybe 3,000 people and the "General Store" sells nothing newer than 1986.. you don't really have a choice. Sure we have Fernie and all the rad little shops there (I'd much rather spend my dime there) BUT and a big fat BUT some days you just want to see something new... splerge on Tim Hortons and literally do a one stop shop. Be with the cowboys and the hooties, buy lunch meat in bulk and stock up on no name canned corn. Nothing wrong with that. Pay my small town dues and every once in a while, once in a blue moon... bust out the box stores and become one with the corporate over lords.

Am I a horrible person? Sometimes. Am I a horrible person that likes a good deal and not constantly buy expired food? Yes. But you would be too, if you were me.

Warped Tour

Hello all,

This blog was going to be about me ragging on the Vans Warped Tour line up, but I did my research and nowww I'm miffed haha!. Terry and I were watching some show on Much Music about the Warped Tour line up and the bands they profiled were SHIT!

Like, weird adolescence, whiny, teeney bopper, wannabe punk band shit...where the lead singers voice is on the cusp of breaking into puberty. I can't stand bands like that! Good god, it makes me want to stab my ears because they just can't take it anymore.

I got all reminiscent of the good ole days of Warped Tour, where Pennywise, Rancid, Bad Religion, NOFX and Face to Face rocked it out while you were in a good ole fashion mosh pit with sun stroke. Anyways, so back to the research part, I looked up Warped Tour and found Pennywise, found Voodoo Glow Skulls, found Face to Face...at the bottom of the page, but they were there. But still, the magic seems to be gone, its more mainstream and more pop the Skate or Die punk rock.

I miss the good ole days, I miss the Punk Show and I miss sun stroke in the mosh pit...bahhhh

3 Years Ago Today, We Celebrated with the Chicken Dance

Happy Anniversary Rebecca and Courtenay!

You can clearly see why they fell in love with each other!

Love ya both!

Mother Mother

For the past few months... three to be exact, I've been in denial. Denial about becoming a mother. I've always been sensitive about the subject, I've always thought that I would never have kids and I've always thought that if I did, I wouldn't be very good at it.

So when I found out I was pregnant, it was a mixed blessing. It was a mixed blessing because of selfishness, because I didn't want to get bigger, I wanted to sleep in and I didn't want to go through the pain that is child birth. But, I think, where I am in my life.. I couldn't be more ready. My partner has a great job, we have a great house and our life was slowing down into a happy groove. I can afford to stay home and take care of my kids, Terry has a great work schedule so he would be around more to help me, I have a great support group here and where I live is very family orientated. So what more did I need? Its all here. But still in the back of my mind, I've had a hard time adjusting.

Until today. Thanks to the wonderful world of Facebook, I came across an article posted by an old friend from school. Brenda Derkacz has leukemia, she has had cancer/leukemia for a few years and for those years she has selflessly fought for her life. I've been lucky in my life to know people like her, some have passed and some have stayed and I hope to god that she stays. I know she will.

So today when I read that article, and read how she got got cancer for the first time shortly after her son was born, it hit me hard. Here I am pregnant with my first child and what if something were to happen to me? or Terry? I've been thinking about this all day, thinking about my own mortality and thinking about leaving my selfishness out the window. I am ready to become a mum, and I am ready to work for anything life throws my way. Brenda, I admire you, I admire your selflessness and I know that in my heart you will see your children grow up and start their own lives... just like we did.

This is the posting to the article I read this morning, I encourage my five readers to read it and send positive vibes her way

http://www.bclocalnews.com/vancouver_island_south/goldstreamgazette/news/100050784.html

ttyl.

Eggo's Should be in Their Own Food Group

I'm tellin' ya, toaster waffles could be the most perfect food... they're not just limited to breakfast..they can be eaten anytime anywhere... provided you have a toaster, of course....

Dear John.

Dear John Cusack,

Please... for the love of god stick with what you know! Stick with the awesomeness that was Hot Tub Time Machine or Say Anything or Gross Pointe Blank... stick with movies with your sister Joan, she seems cool. But please PLEASE never star in an other end of the world action flick.. As one of your biggest fans, I beg youuuuuuu

Thank you for your time, keep on being rad.

Yours Truly,

Lisa

Terry has Curly Hair, Just Like Seth Rogan....

Heyy ya'll! I'm baaaack!

I kind of took a two month hiatus, sorry... lots has been going on in my little life and wellllll I couldn't share it...Until now.
After months of waiting to be out of the "danger zone" I can officially say in old fashioned terms, "I am with child". Sounds so cheezy, perhaps "knocked up" would have been a more relate able phrase?! Anyway, you get the point.

For anyone that knows me, knows that I think children are down right freaky. Sure, they have their moments... like my nephews are pretty rad but and its a huge BUT they aren't mine, they didn't come from me, they have their own mothers and well, I can go home at anytime and live scream free. But and once again a huge BUT, that all changes in 6 months. Come the end of February, I will have my own, I will BE a mother and I will never live scream free again...

Its a new adventure and I've signed up for it with a big red Jiffy marker at the top of the list! I have to put my fear of children, child birth and boogers aside and suck it up to become super mum. Dun Da Da Dun! Where is my cape and my neon leotard? Perhaps I should invest, give something for the neighbors to talk about..

Anyways, I'm back and promise to blog as often as I can... no more hiatus and no more secrets

ttyl

Fuckin' Dog Correction

The fallowing correction must be made about my blog last night about the dumb bitch with the dog:

I'm sorry that I suggested you had kids and a creepy ass husband... I had you confused with the other assholes that own nasty ass Golden Retrievers.

Either way, I keep my promise to call the Bi-Law guy the next time I see your nasty dog

p.s. Nothing against Golden Retrievers, your cool... its your owners that aren't.

Mothman

This goes out to the huge ass moth preventing me from going in the front door of my condo:

You are one creepy, abomination... damn you for making me turn around and walk to the other door across the parking lot.

Damn you woodland, mountain, super bugs. Your fuckin' creepy.

Fuckin' Dog

This blog goes out to the dumb bitch in a red sweater riding up Alder st at 1am this morning:

Put your god awful, poorly trained, miserable dogs on a leash... because next time your dogs charge at me barking and growling, I might be inclined to kick it and call the bi-law officer on your ass.
I bet you don't have dog licenses do you?
This goes for you, your kids and your creepy ass husband.

Regards.

p.s. Yes, I am an animal lover and people like you don't deserve to own pets.

Strangely Weird Dreams #2

An old friend was visiting us with some random french girl and I was cooking pasta for everyone. My house was full of people, Terry, Becca, Court, Phil, Austin, Josh, Chris, French girl and Max
Anyways, I was busy making this huge pasta dish so I was unable to drive Chris to the Mini-Mart before it closes. So my nephew..my two year old nephew.. in perfect English says "I'll take him"... I handed Max the keys and told him to hurry up because dinner was almost ready. As he started to walk away with my keys, the thought finally crossed my mind that Max was too short and couldn't reach the pedals... not the fact that he is two...and didn't know how to drive..let alone run with out falling. I remember in the dream, it was quite the hassle that Max couldn't take Chris...who would?... never mind the other 6 full grown adults in the room.

Strangely Weird Dreams #1

Lately, I've been having the strangest dreams... strange, realistic dreams... So, I thought I might share some of them with you....

Last nights dream:

Kristen Stewart was on Dr.Phil talking about her rarin' ecstasy addiction and her new Martha Stewart tattoo.

Right. Thus concludes my strangely weird dream from last night.

ttyl

The Monday Night Line Up

Mondays are good, do you want to know why? Back to back Intervention and Obsessed. Sure, they are shows that showcase people at their all time low but its like a train wreck... you can't help but watch.

A year ago, I could relate to Obsessed because I have Anxiety disorder. I could see myself in those people, the irrational thoughts and the bizarre behavior. But like most people on the show, I sought treatment, over a year of treatment. In fact, one of my fears was moving here...to the East Koots and a year ago there would be no way in HELL that I would ever move here! I sucked it up through thick and thin and finished therapy and now that I am here, I am settled and I've maybe had two panic attacks in 5 months...watching this show right now... as I type, I see nothing of my new self in these people at all. Cured. Love it.

Intervention on the other hand.. that is a whoooooole 'nother bag of worms. Like I said, its like a train wreck. I watch loyally, every Monday... sad I know. Sometimes when I watch, I can't help think of some old friends from back home... and I hope someday they will be success stories too.

ttyl

Work Those Abs and Buns

Guess what I found at the Transfer Station (ReStore) the other day?!?!!!!!!!!!

A Thigh Master!

Yea! That's right, me and Susan Sommers are going to be besties this Summer.

Amazon Lobster Girl in a Roller Disco Suit

So I totally got the tan line situation under control.. the down fall about it is now I am lobster girl, waiting to join the freak show. I have a perfect tube top and short short tan line... My naked body looks like I'm wearing a white roller disco jumpsuit with red tights and red long sleeves. Very attractive. The past two days, I've been wearing and sleeping on sand paper... No pain no gain, I guess!

Apparently, I'm too big for my dress (thanks Mum)... I thought I looked good...BUT if I can't skinny myself down a few pounds by Leanne's wedding at least I will have the bronzest of bronze tans that my Mother and anyone else wont even notice my dress short comings.. all they will see is amazon girl glory and they wont notice my agony when I'm forced to suck in my stomach all day and all night!

Its too bad I didn't have long hair, I could use it as a curtain..or use it to tie a bow around my waist... perfect decoy.

Gotta love weddings :)

Its begining to look alot like Summer

In the past month we've had 3 days of sun total.

Last weekend we were lucky to have sun for the triathelon and this weekend its shaping up to be a beautiful weekend... Woot! lets hope it keeps up because I have some serious work to do. Last weekend I developed a farmer tan, panic set in so I threw on a wife beater to try and tan it out... after all in less than a month, I have to be a brides maid in a strapless dress. I have horrible vision of Leannes wedding photo's being ruined because of my multiple strap problem.

So, Rebecca feeling my pain, lent me a tube top... I hate tube tops...well let me rephrase that..I love tube tops but not when your six pack is more like a keg. I have never fake n' baked...I've thought of it, but why waste a day in a UV coffin? When you could cop a squat in the back yard with a book and a cold drink?!

My goal this weekend is going to get as crispy as I can, reburn the burns and all the while try not to get skin cancer because you never know when the weather is going to change... we are in the mountains after all.

More Wildlife Photography

My darling nephew Josh was playing with my camera the other day and who would have thought he would have snapped a picture of a bear in my own living room.

This picture totally goes in the history books with the Elk butt/Car Refreshener and the Elk leg photos I shot a few weeks ago.

Good Work buddy!

Heavy Metal Solitude

Its Saturday, no one is home... both Terry and Phil are working and Austin is out with Josh. So needless to say, I have a day of SOLITUDE! yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

I'm currently watching 100 Greatest Hard Rock Songs on Much More Music (naturally with the volume up) The host of the show is Bret Micheals, gotta love him, but my god he has the shiniest lips ever! he must use lip glass from Mac or perhaps a tub of Vasoline... its almost distracting!

So I suppose solitude and hard rock are a bit of a contradiction.. but its on my terms! No Discovery Channel on repeat or the "Children's Programing" Austin watches. Which I must say kids programs have changed a lot since I was Austins age, all his shows seem way too complicated or way too old or wayyyy too stupid... like Bacugaun? (I don't even know how to spell the damn thing) or Pokemon? give me Fraggle Rock or The Raccoons and THAT my friends is quality television! haha

Anyways, back to the Greatest Hard Rock Songs.. watching this show makes me wish I stayed with playing an instrument or could at least carry a tune. Secretly, all my life I've wanted to be in a band... but never had the opportunity, with good reason I suppose hahaha!

Tonight, I'm going to the Miss Elkford Beauty Pageant, so I should have plenty to write about later. Until then...
ttyl

Cranny

Terry and I went to Cranny to find a Tranny, but all we found was Fraggle Rock.

For My Lads at Home

To allllll my darlings in Victoria,

I've noticed a lot of complaints on Facebook about how its been raining... well, its May 29th and its snowing here!.. bah! take that! :)

I must also make a mental note:

When I was home in April/May I stocked up on shorts and summer wear (nievely thinking it was going to be spring when I came home)

Now, when I go home in June/July, I shall stock up on winter wear (you know, realistic thinking because when you live in the mountains, one never knows what the weather is going to do)

ttyl.

Angry Trucks

Driving home from Fernie today, I noticed that 20% of all the Big Rigs I passed had angry faces. Its all in the slanty sun shades....

Hurray for Point and Click!

Ever since I've moved here, I've wanted to start taking wildlife photography, I might as well take my love for photography and apply it to my wilder friends. However, every opportunity I've had to take pictures of Elk or Moose, my camera has been m.i.a....but when I do have my camera the animals are m.i.a...Murphy and his god damn law. So today, when Terry wanted to go up to the look out and check things out, I thought to my self.."Self, I should bring my camera"

And what did I find.. some Elk and what did I do?? take their picture!! and how did the pictures turn out??... shitty!! I managed to take a picture of a leg and the car re freshener with an Elk butt. Totally not National Geographic worthy but damn funny to look at... your your enjoyment and my embarrassment.

Enjoy.

Weirdo Stomach Plague

God damn! this week so far has been a doosey! Sunday, I came down with this weirdo stomach plague...super gross. On the bright side, I guess... is well, it gave me a kick start to my weight loss. 5 days of agony, of the worst kind. I hate not eating, I could never develop an eating disorder because it was so sad to see all the delicious food that I could barely eat go down the drain. Starving, binging and purging is so not worth it... stomach plague, waist of time. Lets hope its out of my system for good.

The 3 Bears...plus 3

Just down from the golf course, there is a huge open field, its kind of boggy and at the very far corner there is an old run down farm house. Becca called me up yesterday morning and asked me if I wanted to go for a walk to the Chauncey Ridge (which is a deli/convenience mart) and of course, being a bridesmaid in a few months, I should get whipped up for wedding photos.

Now, back to the field.. a few days before I flew back to the Koots, there were two Grizzly mums and four cubs spotted in that very field..So to walk to the Chauncey Ridge we walk up this long hill, and below this hill is a cliff and that very cliff leads to the field. Got it?..okay

So when Becca called me and asked me about this walk, she asked me if I could bring my bear spray. Since this bear sighting, Bec hasn't gone for a walk up that way... well because its bloody scary...don't blame her, this wilderness thing is hard to get used to. I popped the bear spray in the cup holder of her baby stroller..you know, for easy access...we were after all treading to bear country. We start climbing the hill... no bears... Spencer starts acting crazy, and it started to wig me out because dogs have that weird animal sense... I think it started to wig Becca out too because she took the bear spray out of the case...you know, for easy access.

We made it to Chauncey no problem..no bears, no fumbling with bear spray when the wind is blowing head on...none of that. It wasn't til later, when Becca and I spotted the old farm house... we were driving by to Sparwood. We kind of laughed because we didn't see the bears, but maybe they made a home for themselves in the cabin. I don't think I would walk up to find out because if they were honestly in there.. they wouldn't be offering me any porridge.

You better Watts out, LB is back in the Koots...and yes watch is spelled Watts, on perpose

My flight home was pretty wicked compared to my flight to Victoria.

When I left for Victoria I had three panic attacks, left wayyyyy to early in the morning, had a massive headache and was clocked in the head with a metal cane...

When I left for Elkford I relaxed all day, ate most of a bag of wine gums waiting for my plane and enjoyed the fine t.v entertainment of "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives"... nothing says a relaxing flight like the Food Network and Guy Fieri. Love him, his bleach blonde hair always amazes me.

We didn't get back to Elkford from Calgary until 3 in the morning.. twas a long day. Exhausting, but worth it... my Bear picked me up and my kitty still recognizes me! I was worried after a month, a month is a long time! Glad to be home, glad to see the Koots and glad to get back to normal... at least for another month and a half, because in July I have to make the trip to Victoria all over again. This time for wedding fever, Leanne and Alex tying the knot on July 3rd....perhaps their wedding will inspire me to plan my own...

...thats right! Terry popped the question this morning and welllllll after being together for almost 9 years, I couldn't bloody well say no! After all, he IS my partner in crime and the love of my life.

Helloooooo Elkford!!!

The wait, yesssss the wait is over, tomorrow I will officially be back in the East Koots. Three days shy of a month and I will be back on mountain soil.

I'll be glad to be back doin' my thang...plottin', bloggin' and house wifein'. I wished I could have blogged more here in Victoria, but honestly there wasn't any wild stories to tell. Just visiting with friends, family and my little pup. So yes in deedly-do, I'll be back at my post bloggin' in my underwear on Wednesday.

Heyyyy you guyyyyyss

Today, walking the dog, I had my first experience with my parents neighbour from across the street. I've lived at my parents house on and off for 6 years, and this was my first experience with her!!

So Daisy decides to take her sweet ass time at the bottom of the drive way, so neighbour decides to point out the obvious and as she turned to speak to me.. she looked and sounded EXATLY like Ma Fratteli from the goonies...you know the crazy ugly old bat that locked up Sloth in the basement.

Needless to say, I got out of there quick, and when I had to walk past her again to go up the driveway..I made no contact and deeked out of there... no fuckin' way I'm getting locked up in the basement.